“Father, make of me a crisis man. Bring those I contact to decision. Let me not be a milepost on a single road;
make me a fork
, that men must turn one way or another on facing Christ in me.” - Jim Elliot

Saturday, August 23, 2008


As I approach the 20th Anniversary of my marriage to Anthony, my mind has been drawn to think of our wedding... our love letters (some over 23 years old)... milestones and memories... and of course... submission.

You know... the verse... somewhere in the Bible... in the New Testament... in Ephesians... chapter 5... verse 24... let's all say it in unison "wives should submit to their husbands in everything."

I remember going through pre-marriage counseling and being asked pretty much, "Sheri, what do you think about submission?" I probably stifled a laugh and with indignation said, "I'm all for anyone submitting to me." Come on, I was 20 years old... and grew up in a home of just women.

I think about the struggling and the controversy over this barely mentioned word submission. I think it is brought up about once a year in church... kind of like tithing. We're "supposed" to do it... but no one likes to talk about it due to fear of offending someone.

I have been attending weddings lately... actually, my friend's children's weddings. (Wow! That makes me feel old!) I have been overwhelmed by the extravagant websites... have you seen these? Photos of the engagement... links to registries... information about the wedding... how to help pay for the honeymoon to Hawaii... and these gals really seem with it. They are prepared. Prepared for the wedding... but I see no link... no information... are they prepared for the marriage? Have they even put one percent of their effort into being prepared for the days... the years... after this incredible dream-like day?

And so I wonder... if I could give these precious princess brides any advice... what would it be?

Ephesians 5:24.

No, really. It would be about submission. Learning how to submit.

To God.

You see, we haven't memorized all of Ephesians 5:24... have we? Let's try it again in unison, "Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything." Okay, so some of us dropped off on that one...

Now, church here does not mean a building... it means us... it means me. How in the world do I submit to Christ? I mean, come on, before we can learn what submission to our husbands looks like, we've got to figure out what submission to Christ looks like.

And so my question is this... Is it easier to submit to a husband... or is it easier to submit to Christ? And my answer may surprise you...

I encourage you to take time to read Ephesians 5:22-33. First, ask the Lord in prayer, "Heavenly Father, help me to understand what these verses are talking about... I want to learn more about who You are." And when you read it... I want you to focus on Christ. What is He doing? What has He done? Who is responding to Him? Can you trust Him? Why would He even want us to submit to Him?

Whether you are a bride-to-be, single, divorced, happily married... or not-so-happily married, my advice to you... is to find out more about our Lord. Spend time with Him... get to know Him... by reading your Bible, doing a Bible Study (whether alone or in a group), praying, attending church... submit yourself to finding out more about His love for you.

And when you get to the point where you feel you know Him... and can trust Him... and realize that He is for you... you'll want to submit to Him and His will.

He loves us, sisters. Take Him at His Word.


BP said...

I enjoyed this. I too wonder about couples being prepared for marriage and not just one wedding day.

elaine @ peace for the journey said...

I've struggled with this one, but my submission to my husband has been made all the more easier because he has loved me in the vein of Ephesians 5:25. I wrote a post about it entitled the same. Billy has loved me as Christ loves the church. Still and yet, it's been a bumpy ride.

I will go and do some more studying. Thanks for the prompt.


Tammy said...

This is wonderful. I am reading Ephesians right now. Haven't got that far but you certainly gave me much to reflect on while I am reading it.
thanks sweet sister and happy anniversary

Anonymous said...

Ephesians5 is a great chapter to be prepared for marriage.